A Curmudgeon In The Making

My recent trip to a conference in New Orleans confirmed beyond a doubt that I have joined the ranks of curmudgeonry. Over the years, I have gradually progressed from an overall annoyance with people, to frustration, then exasperation, and now--overt grumpiness and an intolerance of fools. I don't know if my condition is the result of advancing age, unrealistic expectations or some deeper psychological issue, but people in general have really started to piss me off. Actually, they always have, but in the past I may have been more tolerant because life's long road was ahead of me. Now with it mostly in my rear view mirror, I just do not have the time or patience to put up with basic human stupidity.

It started at the airport. How many air trips does it take for someone to figure out what not to take on a plane? At the screening station, why not just dump your pockets, take off your shoes, jewelry, wrist watch, or anything that might set off the alarm; have a clue what's in your luggage and efficiently move along. Having to stand in a long line is frustrating enough, but when an idiot is causing the hold-up, it is infuriating. One woman, after three tries, finally got all the metal off her person. She made it through, but her carry-on bag didn't. The screeners ran the bag through twice, called over a supervisor, removed her bag to the search area and found a cutlery set! She said she thought it was OK because it was gift-wrapped. Give me a break! At that point, she looked around to see if she had an audience, giggled, and went into a Jessica Simpson stupidity routine. I guess she expected that those of us behind her would get a kick out of her dilemma and her attempt at self-deprecating humor. Wrong! A Jessica Simpson emulation by a fifty-year-old is not at all cute or endearing! All I could hope for was that she was not on my flight.

Then, try getting off the plane filled with a few more idiots. Unloading can go smoothly if people would just wait until those in rows in front of them exit, and then take their turn. But, there are always those who have to push their way up the aisle, blocking the way for those in the row ready to exit. They'll come from the back of the plane, pushing people standing in the aisle and disrupting the whole exit process. Disembarking could be so simple if it wasn't for those few lame brains. After all their efforts to get off the plane, they then take their sweet time walking to the gate area, stopping to adjust their clothing and luggage and getting in everyone's way, totally oblivious to the world around them. It would be fun to bring them back to back to reality with a good slap!

More idiot situations at the hotel...the restaurants...even the conference. It was as if it was an "Idiots' Holiday" out there. I couldn't wait to get back home and crawl back into my hermit's hole. Although this rant could go on for thousands of words, I'm going to stop. It causes too much cortisol and adrenaline to course through my veins. At my age, stress hormones are not a good thing. Sure wish thinking about a few good men would work the same way and get some sex hormones pumping again. Now that would be a good thing!